


"And the dead tree gives no shelter"

by canyouseemyspark



Series: Dorne [4]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canonical Character Death, Death, F/M, Imprisonment, Loss, Pregnancy, Prompt Fic, Regret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-29
Updated: 2012-05-29
Packaged: 2017-11-06 06:34:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/415854
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/canyouseemyspark/pseuds/canyouseemyspark
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Prompt: "The moon tea failed, and she finds herself with child while imprisoned."</p>
            </blockquote>





	"And the dead tree gives no shelter"

For those first dark days, all she did was cry, weep until her eyelids were swollen, her head pounding and her tears unceasing. She dreamt of him, saw him as he was the last time they made love, sprawled across the bed with beads of perspiration on his back. He never got used to the Dornish heat, was constantly complaining about the spicy food and the dusty roads. It had exasperated Arianne but what she wouldn't give to hear his voice again, to feel his hands caressing her cheek, the weight of his body on hers.

The days blended into each other until she could no longer tell morning from night, no longer cared. Her grief poured out of her like a torrent, a downpour which she did not know how to restrain but which she was sure would lead her to madness even as she howled and tore at her hair.

Perhaps this is what her father intended, for her to lose herself to her sorrow, to emerge from the tower a broken woman so it may be easier for Quentyn to take her place. She had done this all so that she may take what is rightfully hers and yet she had lost everything, hurt the little princess and caused the death of the man she loved.

Yes, she knew now that she had loved him, that even as she schemed and plotted she was grateful, happy that he was the man that had been chosen to guard the princess.

Perhaps she knew it all along.

Their first night together reminded her of her own youth, of those days of fervid kisses and clumsy caresses. He hadn't been with a woman in years and when she undressed in front of him, he had the look in his eyes of a long-marooned sailor sighting a ship in the coast. She had oiled herself before so the process would not be more uncomfortable than it had to be, thinking that it may perhaps increase his arousal to think her eager for him. Even as he frantically forced apart her knees, thrusting into her with a frenzied savagery and spending himself within a few moments, she felt the heat building up within her and knew that next time, the oils would not be necessary.

It had taken a few more times after that for him to slow down, to begin to explore her body, to learn how to touch her so that she would yelp at the intensity of the pleasure, scratching at his back and shouting his name until he pressed his lips against hers to quiet her for fear of being discovered.

She prayed that the gods would be merciful enough to take those memories from her, erase from her mind the image of his smiling face when he emerged from between her thighs, his mouth glistening from her moistness. Even as she assured him she didn't mind, he would always make sure to wipe his lips before kissing her, as though he were somehow protecting her honor. And then there were those times when she would take him in her mouth, look up to see his handsome face twisted in pleasure, and he would kiss her after even as his seed still clung to her mouth, as though in gratitude or adoration.

Memories could fade, _would_ fade, but regret lingered and festered within her. 

They had planned a life together, a marriage that would bind them, a life which Arianne had never truly considered. She thought them empty words, false promises that would be forgotten when the princess turned into a queen. She had seen those hopes flash in his eyes as he turned back to look at her even as his horse galloped towards Areo Hotah, towards his doom.

She should have screamed for him, should have ran for him and left them all behind, promised herself to him as he had to her, granted him more than a few fleeting hours with her body but ceding her whole soul, given up her life as he had done for her.

_But now it's too late, and grief is my lover._

It had been a week, perhaps two, when she was finally able to see through her tears and notice the tenderness in her breasts, the uncomfortable swelling of her body, the dryness in her smallclothes where there should have been her moonblood. 

She had always been sure to take her moon tea, the fear of pregnancy looming over her like a dark specter that threatened to ruin all of her plans. Then, she couldn't have imagined anything worse and yet now she found praying for it, feeling the intensity of her hope as strongly and as painfully as she felt her sorrow.

It was a few days after that when she began to fill her chamber pot with bile and she awoke the next morning to find a cup by her bedside, placed there by one of her silent attendants as she slept, swirling with tansy leaves and flowers.

For a moment she thought of lifting it to her mouth, of ridding herself of a future in which she would not been known to the Seven Kingdoms as Princess Arianne of House Martell but the Dornish whore who brought a bastard, brought dishonor to her family.

But then she thought of the child, the boy or girl who might have Arys' light brown hair, his hazel eyes, his comely face and his open smile. She would love the child as she should have – as she  _did_ – love the father, make new memories of life and first steps instead of last kisses and doom.

She got to her feet and slowly tipped out the tea on the ground, smashing the cup on the ground until the chips of glass scattered among the discarded, unused leaves.

_The babe within me is heir to Dorne, child of a knight of the Kingsguard, a man I loved too late. This child is my salvation._


End file.
